Friday, October 31, 2014

Halloween in NYC

The question "What are you doing for Halloween?" has been asked a bunch this week. Thing is, I am not a fan of Halloween in NYC. 

When I told Tom this, he got offended and said that I was being too critical of New Yorkers, and told me how him and his sister used to Trick or Treat. They would leave in costume with their mom and walk to 5th Ave (Brooklyn) to stop into every business. The avenue is filled with restaurants, 99cent stores, bakeries and delis throughout Sunset Park, where the owners and cashiers would put out bowls of candy and the kids would fill their bags with goodies. They never really stopped in at houses (since most buildings were just apartments), but there was the "holiday house" on 57th street where the owner would decorate and wait outside with bags of popcorn. And they were back home by 7:30.

Okay, fine. But I've never seen that. I have seen a lot of other things on Halloween, and heard the stories and seen the news on November 1st. So, while I don't want to accuse my husband of being biased, he totally is. I think the candy and the naivete of youth has left him with fond memories.

Tonight we are staying home, with a movie and some candy.
I can't imagine doing anything in NYC for Halloween (even trick or treating). Here's Why.
Drunk party-goers wandering the street from party to party. 

It's like St. Patricks day, where even if it is Tuesday at 8am and you are commuting to work, people are already falling down drunk. Last night (the 30th) on my commute home I saw 2 people faceplant because they were so far gone. Add in some ridiculously high heeled women and you have an emergency room visit.

Naked/sexualized costumes, all day long.

I'm not opposed to dressing up. I laugh at people in funny costumes, and think the little kids are adorable. But, when you're on your way to work, you are more likely to find yourself commuting alongside the woman dressed as a sexy cop/firefighter/prisoner. You know, the classics. The men tend to be more imaginative, but that opens the door for them to dress as, you know, genitalia. Or any other controversial costume they can think of. Imagine commuting with that sitting across from you, and being a mother with her young child sitting next to that.

Eggs. 

Thrown from kids on the street and on top of buildings. If you ask me, I'd prefer to avoid any activity where I could get egg on my face. Or car, or home. Or anything. Delis and grocery stores have taken to 'locking up' eggs during Halloween, especially since egg throwing often escalates into violence.
The L Magazine
Crowds.

I once attended a little parade known as the NYC Village Halloween Parade. Which, for the record, is nothing like the hometown Halloween parades I grew up with. No firetrucks, Girl Scouts with their floats, and little kids running to collect candy they threw. I've never, since moving here, had a panic attack, until I went to this parade. Besides all the hyper-sexed people walking around, smoking pot and drinking out of their purses, you couldn't move. Could not.

The only time you actually moved was when a fight broke out and the pushing forced others to back up on top of you. I went with my old roommate and her husband years ago, and we ran away to get dinner instead, after having gotten separated several times. Insane. Absolute, uncontrolled chaos. I think the parade needs to get shut down, but doubt that anyone with enough sway agrees. And the theme this year? The Garden Of Earthly Delights. Get out of the Manhattan tonight while you can, or suffer the consequences.

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I miss rural Pennsylvania. Where the worst thing I've every known to happen (or, ahem, participated in) was TPing (toilet papering property). Maybe some silly string. And that person who handed out toothpaste instead of candy. He was the worst.

So tell me...
Do you avoid Halloween where you live?
Are you going out/trick or treating, going to an event, or staying home?



Same reason I stay inside for New Years.

4 comments:

  1. My neighborhood growing up in PA was great for trick or treating! Very safe and lots of houses with good candy. Who in the world gave you toothpaste?!? Haha that's outrageous. I'm not doing anything this year. It's been awhile since I've dressed up and gone to a Halloween party.

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    1. Someone was (I suppose) very concerned about the dental hygiene of the kids. Must have been a dentist. Actually, he must NOT have been a dentist, a dentist would want the kids to come in with cavities :)

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  2. I love the way you write Farin:). You make very valid points too. I had a FB friend dress up (tongue-in-cheek) as a sexy kitchen appliance. Can you believe it? Kind of a joke...but she still wanted to be sexy lol. A movie night in with the hubs sounds lovely. Hope you enjoyed it! xo

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    1. We did! And I believe the kitchen appliance. I saw a 'sexy Ebola nurse" outfit last night while surfing the web.

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